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Changing The Rules With Those Close To You

Over the last 10 years I have changed the ules with those close to me, So what does that mean?

Well I let people treat me a certain way for a period of time. Then I woke up  (usually thru self discovery or with help of a professional) and decided it was not okay anymore and changed MY behavior. THEN I didn’t accept the ways they continued to treat me.

I had to realized that it all begins and ends with ME. I can’t change THIER ways of doing things, but I could change my reactions.

I got tired of feeling bad or that I always got “the short end of the stick.” IN some cases you can talk with the people you are dealing with and sometimes change and growth can happen together. Of course that is usually the desired outcome you want! But many times that is not the reality. You have to find a way to let go of what THEY are doing and be strong and move forward and be able to defend yourself.

It’s oaky to say NO. It’s okay to simply say when something doesn’t work for you. It’s okay.

I quietly started changed the rules with certain people. I don’t even know if THEY have noticed. I havent done it in a mean way. When someone who does NOTHING for me asks for my help with something, I say NO if I  feel like it. AND don’t feel bad. If you talk to me a certain way, I choose how I want to respond and there are times I might not respond. I’m much happier these days.

I don’t let people put thier “stuff” on me! And you shouldn’t either. I try to walk through the world with care and compassion and non judgement. I stay in my lane and try to be nice to everyone. I also believe in being treated a certain way that is respectful to me! I encourage you all to do the same!

 
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Posted by on June 13, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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What Does Being Proud Mean

 

June is Gay Pride Month. February is Black History Month. March 17th is St Patricks Day. May 5th is Cinco De Mayo. The foruth Thursday of November is Thanksgiving. It has got me thinking about these specialized moments. These are set aside for specifice groups or events that happened. Each has their celebrators as well as their detractors. Blacks joke that we get the shortest month of the year. Some straight people are pissed there isn’t a pride parade for them. Some of the beginnings of theses days may have some controversy. It begs the question, do these moments help or hurt us?

Many people forget or don’t know some of these pride moments were born out of struggle and fight. Times to find their place in the world and be acounted for. They can be moments for awareness and education. It is no pain olympiics. We are in a great time. Some of the “history” is not accurate and not that’s changing. We are able to tell the correct history and right wrongs from the past!

There is room for everyone to be who they are. No one needs to feels threatned by any of these. We should feel proud of who we are and where we come from. We should feel proud of our rich heritages. It’s okay to look back and celebrate how far we’ve come. In the end, my hope is that we learn from the past and not repeat or continue things that don’t help us.

 
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Posted by on June 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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Going Bigger and Broader

Above is my new flyer for my new project on Tha Afterparty Radio! If you are a follower of my work, then the show title Extra Connections may look familiar. YES its a show that I have been podcasting for several years. NOW I have brought it to a new Internet Radio Station here in my home of Inglewood, CA. The show will air LIVE Monday’s from 7-8pmPST on Facebook as a video show and online as radio show! Then It will appear as a podcast on my usual platforms of Spreaker.com, iTunes and iHeart Radio I am so excited and I have some great guests lined up! Also it expands my reach in the LA area!!

Also I am expanding the Extra Connections universe. I will also still have some audio only podcasts too! I’m ALL about connecting you with people,place, things and ideas in multiple ways. And I will be doing more FB lives from the page and posting some short quick videos on MY connecitons.

Here is the link to my page

Here is the link to my LIVE Show

Join me and lets connect!

 
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Posted by on May 17, 2019 in Podcasts, Radio

 

I Have Reached The Half Century Mark Today!

I live by Jim Carrey’s words!! Sooooo true! I find as I get older that your mind really does shift from pleasing others to doing what’s best for you! 

I don’t know what people thought when I was born in 1969. It was a very different time in our history. Now as I look back on my 50 year history, It is remarkable that I am where I am today. I overcame many things. I worked hard. I have started over several times in life. I have survived. I have thrived. I’ve had amazing people in my life and not so great people in life as well, but each has taught me major life lessons.

Turning 50 makes me highly aware of my mortality. Chances are I have less years ahead of me than more years. I feel a sense of urgency to get all the things done that I want to do. But I also feel a sense of self care, more time for myself in the middle of all the things that I do. 

I am grateful to God that I have made it because there are many who don’t and I plan to continue to try to affect change in the world! 

 
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Posted by on May 10, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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9 Days till 50!

SO it’s May 1st! May 1, 2019.

What does that mean exactly?

Well we are entering the fifth month of the year! I can’t believe that much time has passed already. I am two months shy of my Bells Palsy diagnosis 1 year anniversary. THAT is crazy. It seems like a distance memory in some ways. I look at those pics and videos and I feel so bad for that James. I have come a long way in my recovery. I am 95 percent better. It was a long, scary, challenging road. Now cut to tonight where I’ll be standing in front of the National Association of Pre Natal Social Workers in Savannah Georgia sharing part of that experience in my presentation of Self Care For the Social Worker. I feel so grateful and honored to be able to get out there and talk about this!

I have started a series of Self Care’s: For the Social Worker, For The Professional Organizer, Why Gardening is Great, this is my crusade. People are dying OR having major health issues at younger and younger ages. I Am able to combine health and wellness with my Life Coaching and organizing AND i have experiences to share.

My birthday is 9 days from now. I will be 50 years old. I don’t know what that means in the large scheme of things, but I do know one thing:

Life is a series of up and downs and cant avoid them but you can move through them!

Happy May!

 
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Posted by on May 1, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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James at 150!

This is my 150th post. I started this blog years ago but didn’t post as much. But now I am posting more and have made a commitment to myself to build this as much as my other blog The Super Organizer Universe. 

Since I’ve been posting more on here, the numbers have gone up, naturally, and i’m having fun doing it! This blog is to give you more insight into me and my media work. Right now I am on a train. I have some traveling to do for work and for personal. I love any chance I get to leave LA and see other parts of our great country. I recommend to everybody! It’s good to leave you regualr surrounds and life and see others. I always come back to LA refreshed and reenergized. And in some cases, more appreciative. LOL

I’ll be turning 50 while on the road and this could not be more fitting. I have travelled so much in my life that this makes sense. I would hit a milestone birthday on the road! Also May brings the end of some things and the beginning of others. I am ending a TV show then starting another. I sold a home of mine but the money will help me with so much. I have new music coming out. I am currently working on several books and I hope to release them in May. I am ending some jobs that will free me up to new opportunities.

The last years have been a trying time for me. I have been retooling and editing my life personally and professionally. I feel excited about the future for the first time in a long time…

 
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Posted by on April 27, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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Happy 4 Years as an Ordained Minister

 

SO today marks my 4 year anniversary as an Ordained Minister. What does that mean? Well its my 2nd stint being ordained. I was ordained for years in the 2000’s and then lost some stuff and decided to add Jr to my name on this. Yes I am spiritual and believe in GOD. I have done work with churches and some of their programs helping our young men of color. I did work with my Aunt/Pastor Faith and her SF Church of Compassion in San Francisco. AND two years ago, I was honored with a Doctorate of Divinity by a local university.

Yes this ordination is from the Universal Life Church online. Anybody can do it. Much fun has been made of it. But the services I have peformed with the ordination were real, honest, not funny. I was able to affect change in people’s lives. I shared special moments. I will be marrying my daughter and her man next year. It has been a wonderful having the option to be there for people in their important moments of their lives.

I’m so glad I did it and Happy Anniversary to me!

 
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Posted by on April 21, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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