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4 Months Ago Today…..

30 Oct

Four months ago today I woke up and my mouth didn’t work properly and my ear hurt sooooo much. Super scared, I called my mother and told her I was going to the clinic. After several hours, I was diagnosed with Bells Palsy. Over the next three days, I helplessly watched my face droop (the left side) and lose control and feeling on that side. My eye, nose and mouth were paralyzed. That’s right PARALYZED! Could not feel them or lift them. My face was swollen and inflammed. The cranial nerve was damaged. I was put on meds right away. I couldn’t be;ieve this was happening to me!!! And I was told mine was probably caused by the extreme stress I was having in my personal life.

I was also told that most cases of Bells Palsy do clear up and the nerves go back to normal BUT……the timeline is different for each person. I could be fine in as early as 2 weeks or 1 year. ONE YEAR!!! My career is based on my talking and using my mouth!!! I sunk into a deep depression. I did lots of research and got vitamins and the foods that help with inflammation and nerve repair. I stopped EVERYTHING to rest! I wouldnt wish the first month and a half I had on ANYONE! During that time it was hard to eat, sleep, cough, spit, drink.. I literally lost my smile. I couldn’t laugh. My vision was blurred and and head was light. Day after day I was alone, I had to do everything myself. I had no one to take care of me. During this time I felt suicidal. I couldn’t live like this anymore.

After the month and a half, my face started coming back to life, and that’s been my journey so far. Everyday i’m in pain somewhere on my face or in my head. Which is supposed to be a good thing, cuz it means the nerves are coming back to life. I’m so over having this. I can’t STRESS THAT ENOUGH!!!! There are days that I live moment to moment and want to cry.

The positives are that I’ve been eating super healthy and have lost 50 lbs in 10 months total. From the neck down, I feel so much better. I am in tune with my body and all the signals it sends me. When I have an anxiety attack , I can calm myself down. I have edited my work life to work even more  of doing exactly the things I want to be doing. I am not back to where I was and that does get me down sometimes but I am determined to push through this and see the other side. My hope is that there won’t be a fifth month or sixth month…..

 
2 Comments

Posted by on October 30, 2018 in Uncategorized

 

2 responses to “4 Months Ago Today…..

  1. terirose22

    October 30, 2018 at 7:20 pm

    James I’m so sorry that you were going through all of this alone…and I’m so glad that you decided to share your struggles with us.

    Liked by 1 person

     
    • James Lott Jr CTACC

      October 31, 2018 at 1:48 am

      Thank you. I don’t have a partner or spouse and my immediate family has been no help

      Like

       

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