it really hurts
i can feel you…everywhere
i wish i could see you…anywhere
I went to the store to buy you a Christmas card
Isn’t that crazy. You’ve been dead for a minute now.
I went to the store and I saw all the things you would like.
I cried at a CD of Chaka Khan. I cried at a book for Top Chef. I cried a cute sweater vest in your size.
emotions are swirling all through my head. they are drowning me.
I’m trying to come up for air
I knew this would happen but i was not prepared for it…fully
I remember all the good years we had to together. All the Christmas holidays.
then i smile again.
I still have people HERE that i need to give attention to
I still have people here to celebrate the holiday with.
I still have people here at Christmas..and some of them miss you too.
We can miss you together. The survivors.
We can love you together.
I want to be someone who is missed when i am gone.
I have to remember whether i am missing them or being with who’s left
Love is filling the room.
Love is filling my heart
Love is lighting my Christmas.